I know what the secret is to keep. I know what the secret is today. It started with a little note in the second hand that my mother wrote. My dad keeps it close like a perfect gentleman. Written on the back a photograph that he stuck on the inside of his wallet, which he keeps on him, like a perfect gentleman. and it read: “I know what the secret is to you, and I know exactly what I want to do. I love you more than ever tonight and I’ll show you by the letter I write, if you’ll keep me close like a perfect gentleman. I’ll love you every single second that you let me take a glance. I’ll let you take my hand, just don’t let me down tonight.” If I know what the secret is to keep, can I find out what it’s like to be alive? If you’ll keep me on the back of a photograph that’s a still-frame of good times we’ve had, then I’ll keep you close like a perfect gentleman. And we’ll know what it’s like to be alive.

Right now, I will escape from here and do the very best that I’ve ever done. Right now, I will escape from here and whisper all my deepest secrets in your ear. So, Listen: Right now, I’m not who I was back then. I’m in the gladdest state that I’ve ever been. Right now, I’m dropping all my fears and starting a brand-new day in a brand-new year. So listen to me now; listen to my roar. Listen to me cut myself wide open at your door. Listen to me now or watch me go; because I’m never coming back, and this is the last time you’ll ever know me. Last night I had the strangest dream; it was a dream about everything and nothing. Last night, in that strangest dream, I knew that it was either this or it will all have been for nothing. I ain’t ever comin’ back.

It seems like every best friend is another worst intention.. another mistake added to the collection. And I’ll be damned if I am ever more than pretty words. I’m seven dwarves, but I’m never worth another war that never works: Me v.s Myself. And I can’t look you in the eyes when we speak, cuz’ each time we meet, the distance is growing in miles. In miles.. These words won’t say themselves. I’m sleeping on strangers’ floors, never seeming to want more than a bit of attention..just a bit of affection. But I’ve got you criticising everything about me. So, here we are. We’re like summer-smiles who never speak, chasing colours week to week. We can’t decide who we want to be, no, we can’t decide who we want to be, yeah. Well, I’m just trying to get close enough. I’m just trying to stand up for myself, because my legs have just about turned to dust, dirt, and ground. I’m just trying to sit down. Because what’s the point in backing down now?

I woke up and everyone was gone. So I sat down with myself, because everyone was gone. Do you remember those days? No arguments? Wasted; your face on the pavement? Because I can’t. So I won’t. No, I won’t. because: We are wasting our hearts. That’s enough let downs... I guess I’ll see you around. Yeah, I’ll see you. I can’t wait until the sunlight hits my face again. So many times I’ve said not to bank on promises and lies.

Feeling like an addict with another addiction. What sort of diction should I use? What should I do to be sure I lose? What will I do? You’re just like an actor with another commitment. What sort of resentment will you choose? What will you do to be sure you lose? What will you do? Will you stay for a moment? Will you wait for the chance? Will you stay for the moment when we can do it again? If you’ll keep the world spinning, then I will sleep it all away. I never did learn when to move and when just to stay still. when to move and when just to Stay for a moment. When to wait for a chance. When to stay for a moment where we can do it again. Will you stay for a moment? Will we wait for the chance? Will you stay for a moment when we can do it again? Won’t you stay with me so that we can be a part of this lie? Just for a moment, just for a chance of life. Welcome to this game we play. Let’s make it all make sense.

I wish that I could sink into my deepest dreams.. because strength feels a lot like being weak. On top of mountains air is dry and hard to breathe.. or so it seems.. It’s such a tragedy, what happened to your heart licking up glass off that dirty floor. Swallowing pride like a picked-at scab and finding out that was the best option you had. But I’ll wait for you. For you, I’ll find a way to stay positive..I’m positive. My thoughts in transit, a Transatlantic poetry. I’m drifting off… and it’s not half-as-good as we’d hoped it’d be, but I’ll keep looking for it. Is everything about promises? (I’ll wait for you) It’s not important to be right. But I’ll work on broken promises, and I’ll keep waiting for you (For you, I won’t be afraid of the truth) forever.

I've got these voices in my head of all the darkest words you said; like monsters, sleeping in my bed. I've got this curse like it’s the plague. I haven’t left my bed for days.. not like I ever sleep anyway. ..and I've never felt more alone, than I have with you. But I don’t feel like dying. I don’t feel like lying on the cutting room table, split wide open but still able. If it hasn't been enough to watch me self-destruct, then these long-distanced fantasies won’t mean a thing. I've still got these voices in my head of all the darkest words you said; like monsters, sleeping in my bed. So like some drop-dead Romeo, I sneak into your room to pour salt into your wounds with every song I write. ..and I've never felt more alone, than I have with you. There are so many different ways for me to tell you exactly what I want to say. Like: I won’t ever be the same..and I don’t really want to complain, but...I guess I’m gonna do so anyway. I was just trying to go outside with my friends, be someone on whom someone depends..making mistakes and making amends..trying to figure out the meaning and what the plan is. I’m breaking hearts, putting things together then take ‘em apart; and you never end up what you were at the start..a lukewarm, dry-erase Joan of Arc. I’m just a wannabe, but still… I've never felt more alive, now that I’m without you. Now I feel like a lion and I swear I’m always smiling and keeping it together. C’mon, tell me if you ever got enough? Because I won’t self-destruct and these long-distanced fantasies won’t mean SHIT.